Wednesday, December 2, 2015

Wynnie's Heavenly Anniversary

Christopher Wynn Johnson 
Oct. 27, 2008- Dec. 2, 2014

Today we celebrate Wynnie's life by honoring today's special significance.  A year ago today around 11pm Wynnie bravely earned his angel wings.  There's so much I remember of that day.

I remember waking up with a weird feeling about him so I had his nurse take a back seat all day and assist me from the background while I intentionally held him all day long.

I remember showing him pictures of "Heaven is For Real" Jesus and showing him pictures of my parents throughout the day (yes I still think the Heaven is for Real Jesus painting looks exactly like Kenny Loggins circa 1980).  I wanted Wynnie to know their faces really well so that he'd recognize them as soon as he entered his new home whenever that would be.

I remember Chris having a serious talk with Ben and Alex about how when they wake up Wynnie may possibly no longer be with us.  So that afternoon they loved on him, talked to him and gave him many kisses.  I remember Ben gave his Froggy to Wynnie to keep him company and take care of Wynnie.

I remember Marcia being here with us all afternoon and evening and helping us stay calm and love on Wynnie; and feeling so thankful for her being in our lives.

I remember texting jokes to friends all day to keep myself distracted with funny stuff instead of crying because why would Wynnie want to be with someone who was a sourpuss all day? A happy mom is way more fun.

I remember Luna snuggling next to Wynnie very protectively while he napped in the family room.

I remember feeling so immensely blessed to have had Melinda, Wynnie's hospice nurse, come to our home within minutes of his passing to help us do everything that needed to be done for us so that we could focus on Wynnie instead of all the administrative stuff.

When Wynnie passed I remember never feeling as close to Chris as ever.  I had never seen him as emotional as I did that evening.  I remember Chris took time to pick out Wynnie's final cute outfit after we bathed him and made him look handsome as ever one last time.  I remember how sad we felt when the funeral home came to take Wynnie away.

Once they took him away I remember feeling so weird and empty and neither of us was sleepy so we both made ourselves a stiff drink and watched ESPN for a long time until we got sleepy.

Even though I remember every little detail down to what I was wearing that day (I've never worn that shirt since), what I remember most is the beautiful life and spirit that God entrusted us to enjoy for six wonderful years.  So as I write this, this is the only time I'll boo hoo and cry today because for the rest of the day I will focus to celebrate Wynnie's life.  Chris and I will have a stiff drink at dinner tonight and we'll reminisce about all the great things that made Wynnie such an earth angel.

I hope people remember how he was way before he started to get really sick and i-cell started to take a toll on him.  He was funny!  He was loud!  He babbled and moved around the house more than Dori did back in his prime.  He made the funniest noises with his mouth!  Sometimes he sounded like a cat!  I was obsessed his pooping... it was a like a side show! He was the only Johnson son that would let anyone snuggle him for hours and wouldn't wiggle his way out, he would just let you love on him as much as you needed to.

He. Was. Awesome.

We miss you little prince!  Keep watching over us and keep having a blast in heaven.  We can't wait to see you again someday!  
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Tuesday, December 1, 2015

What happens during Thanksgiving, stays in Thanksgiving!

What a fun and busy last couple of weeks our family has had!  One week before Thursday of Thanksgiving Chris spontaneously planned a trip for us to go to Vegas (for the Canelo/Cotto fight).  I told him I wouldn't go without Ben and Alex.  Dori of course was going to be fully covered with nurses and Marcia so I didn't feel comfortable leaving them with neighbors while we jetted off to Vegas with less than 12 hours notice.  So he altered the trip to include a day in LA and we took a flight in less than 1/2 a day from when the plan was concocted.

The boys had never been to California and had a blast spending the day at Universal Studios.  It brought back so many memories from when I went there with my parents. Then the next morning we beat the traffic from LA to Vegas and had brunch at our favorite brunch place- Mon Ami Gabi in Paris on the strip.  The boys loved the food and were amazed as we gave them a tour down the strip to see all the hotels.  That night they went hog wild at the kids club at Green Valley Ranch (where we always stay, off the strip) while Chris and I went to Mandalay Bay for the fight.  The fight wasn't as memorable as other fights but we had a complete blast with all the other spectators and I was able to speak my Spanish that I rarely get to use around this house between all the Puerto Rican fans and the Mexican fans.

The next day we spent the entire day with the boys watching NFL, going to downtown Vegas for brunch where they got to see an asian male model photo at the pool (yes, random I know), they almost were brave enough to go zip lining across downtown but at the last minute chickened out (I don't blame them!).  That night we went to Lavo for dinner -- YUM (Alex ate nonstop -- his food plus 1/2 of Ben's full sized flat bread pizza).  Before heading to the strip for the evening we warned the boys that they would see alot of crazy outfits that might look like costumes, and also see/hear lots of inebriated people.  As luck would have it, by 5:10 pm during dinner the boys got to see first hand what a "side walker" is --- that's the person who is so intoxicated they can't walk straight ahead, they walk side to side.  We also went to the Michael Jackson Cirque show -- it was fantastic!  I cried twice. They were excited to tell all their friends about the side walkers as soon as we came back home.

Then within a couple of days we hosted Friendsgiving with our neighbors and dear friends the Mazurs.  We all ate, watched lots of football and told lots of stories.  Dori had a blast being the center of attention in between his naps that day.  He ate so much mashed potatoes and guacamole that I thought his tummy was gonna burst.  He officially cannot fit into 1/2 the brand new clothes he received for his birthday at the end of October.  Dori's motto is a cross between "Go big or go home" and "if you cooked it I might as well eat it".  It was good to see how happy and chatty he was all day long with everyone.

This morning Ben and Alex left for the rest of the week to go to camp with all the rest of their 6th grade class.  I begged and reminded them repeatedly to take a shower DAILY and to use deodorant DAILY while they are there. I'm hoping they do.  When Chris dropped them off this morning he said all the 6th graders looks pumped and ready to go!  How fun!  They've been gone for just a little over 12 hours and we are missing them terribly, but it's neat to see them have so much fun with all their new school mates.
Here the boys were taking in all the pre-fight hoopla at the Mandalay and fake fighting

Here Dori is moving in on Ben while he watches cartoons.  

This past weekend we were all sitting in our home bar area watching football while Dori was taking a nap on his bipap vent machine.  It was late afternoon and normally he sleeps for a couple of hours before he wakes up for dinner and bath time.  We had the TV on pretty loud watching games and the boys were relaxed playing video games and Ben excused himself to use the restroom.  When he came back through the kitchen to use the bathroom (next to Dori's room) he screamed "Dori's machines are going off and he's down to 28!!!!".  Chris and I ran into Dori's room and realized Dori had pulled his tubing off his breathing mask so he was basically not getting any oxygen support.  We quickly reconnected his tubing to his face mask and within probably 15 seconds he had dropped down all the way to 18 then crept back up into the 90's.  I felt HORRIBLE.  We turned around and hugged Ben and thanked him for catching it for us (we didn't want to act panicked in front of him) and Ben kept on saying "I'm glad God made me feel like I had to go to the bathroom because if I hadn't I wouldn't have been able to save Dori's life! Thank you GOD!!!"  He is absolutely right!  As much as we were just having a quiet evening at home just the 5 of us relaxing, we couldn't hear any of his machine alarms from the bar/tv room.  Dori's room and the bar are less than 12 paces and I feel so bad that he was struggling and we didn't hear a single beep, a single alarm -- nothing.  So now unless there is nurse on duty, I not going to venture past the kitchen.  Poor Dori!  So thankful for Ben!  So glad instead of it being a scary thing, it turned into a learning moment for us all.  Damn football. I don't even remember what game it was.  Most definitely not worth it.  So we have ALOT to be thankful for as we head into December and the Christmas holidays.  I'm so lucky to be the mami to this fun group of boys and the wife to this crazy guy!  Look what I found while cleaning out Dori's closet?!   Can you guess who's who??? ha ha ha 
My mom had to cut my hair short because I cried too much when she or my dad would detangle it.  I looked like a boy for YEARS. 

Behold... Chris.... with HAIR!!!!! Once upon a time.